When Sarcasm Bites Back

Our two-year-old daughter has in the last month taken to announcing when she either wets or soils her diaper. Since this began around the holidays, I did absolutely nothing about it. The whole potty-training thing seemed like too much to deal with on top of the fa-la-la-la-ing and the ho-ho-ho-ing. (My excuse for not diving in now is...nonexistent. But that's another post.)

The other morning, we were loosely gathered in the kitchen through that inexplicable magnetism a mother has for her children. Small bodies were indiscriminately orbiting in my gravitational system, with each tiny planet disrupting the other's flight plan periodically, when there came an announcement:

"Mommy, I made pee-pee!"

This declaration is invariably followed by a tiptoed, bow-legged dance step not seen in any ballet with which I'm familiar. (Maybe an opera? The Pirates of Wet Pants?)

In reaction to his sister's announcement, my four-year-old son (who has excretion issues all his own), rather dramatically sighed, "Oh, GREAT."

Ashamed that he had probably heard this reaction from me one too many times, I guiltily pretended I didn't hear him and went about finishing whatever it was I was working on so that I could change the young one's diaper.

After a (too) short silence, big brother spoke up again.

"Mama," he said, "what does it mean when you say 'great,' but it's...well..."

He seemed puzzled. Then just a beat later, he managed to say what he was getting at: "You say 'great,' but it's not great. What does that mean?"

It seems my parental arsenal is being depleted. First the kid starts reading and knows when I'm trying to burn through a bedtime book by paraphrasing/condensing, and now he calls me on my sarcasm.

That's just great.